Sometimes mourning has been equated with selfishness.

But once upon a time, “Jesus wept.”

When my brother was taken to Heaven some years ago, it felt like an atomic bomb went off. So young, so sudden with so much love to give and life left to live.

John 11:5 states “Now Jesus loved Martha and her sister and Lazarus.”   We know that Jesus’ love was not selfish, so why did he allow himself to weep?  He wept even knowing he would raise Lazarus.

Ecclesiastes 3 shows that there is a time for everything, even mourning.  Despite my hope that Jesus has prepared a place for my brother (John 14) I still mourned his loss.

The emotion of mourning is no different than that of joy, such as I felt on my wedding day.  My grief at my brother’s death manifested itself in mourning great tears, just as my joy on my wedding day manifested itself in smiles.

I will admit that we can mourn from selfishness, but most mourn because it’s because something we love in no longer around to love.

Only the memories linger, the fun, warm embraces, sharing joys and sorrows and just doing life with the long lost loved one.

However, it is one of God’s gifts that we feel emptiness when we lose a loved one, especially if they were salt and light to us.  We are not selfish if we hurt, but rather are ready for God’s ministering hand.

I have grieved from places in my heart that I did not know existed, yet found comfort as scripture promises in Philippians 4:7.  I now know the “peace that passes understanding”, a peace that does not make sense.

Paul reminds us, “I would not have you ignorant brethren concerning those who have fallen asleep, lest you sorrow as others who have no hope (I Thess. 4:13).”  My opinion is that we mourn with hope, not that we avoid mourning.

We keep God from ministering to us if we judge ourselves to be selfish when we grieve.  When we include Him in the grieving process he confirms that his Word is true, and mourning will not undo us. 

For the believer, mourning is a doorway to knowing God’s comfort personally.  Jesus promises “Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted (Matt. 5:4).”  We know better how to minister to others having received God’s comfort.

One day we will be with Him in glory and weep no more.  It is only then that we will be able to live happily ever after.

Amazing!